Learning to Stand Your Ground

Many broken relationships are the result of the balance of power being overbalanced in favour of one party. If this happens to be the case between you and your ex, then now is the time to start growing that spine. If the thought of standing up to your ex frightens the living daylights out of you, then take heart that your new spine doesn’t just grow overnight, it grows little by little as you begin to re-establish your power. Sometimes it is as simple as establishing a basic physical boundary, such as not letting him past the front door of your home. Placing a physical boundary such as this on your ex, reminds him that he does not have the right to take the same liberties as when you were together. Of course this can change over time as you both adjust to your new relationship, but in the beginning, when friction is at its highest, this is a very useful tactic to assert your new power, particularly if you have a lot of trouble saying no to your ex. That way if he turns up and starts putting you under pressure, all you have to do is firmly ask him to leave and close the front door. Little by little you will start to feel more confident and stand your ground where it counts.