Choosing Your Battles

One of the most difficult adjustments to make after separating from your husband is coming to an agreement with the way that you both intend to raise your children going forward. Chances are the reason you are not together is because there are too many things you disagree on including differences in decisions and choices regarding your kids.

 Regardless of whether you like your ex or not, the reality is that he is on your team and there is nothing you can do to change that; and the key to making the best of the situation is to choose your battles. For example if your ex feeds your child a little bit of junk food and you are totally opposed to junk food, honestly weigh up the impact that this will have on your child. If you have trouble being objective due to your personal baggage from the relationship, seek another opinion from a friend whom you know will tell you the truth as opposed to telling you what you want to hear. That way you can better gauge what is a reasonable compromise.

 In many cases, as you become more flexible and respectful of your ex’s relationship with your kids, he will notice and chances are the goodwill will begin to flow back to you.